Today's Dare
Whatever you haven't forgiven in your mate, forgive it today. Let it go. Just as we ask Jesus to "forgive us our debts" each day, we must ask Him to help us "forgive our debtors" each day as well. Unforgiveness has been keeping you and your spouse in prison too long. Say from your heart, "I choose to forgive."I've been on this dare for a couple days now. Really thinking about what it means to forgive. I feel like everyday I'm forgiving for things over and over again. Why is this such a hard thing to do? We feel hurt, betrayed, angry and bitter by others. Those are really hard emotions to let go of.
In Matthew 18:21-22, it tells us a story of Peter. He asked Jesus how many times he had to forgive others who sin against him and Jesus said, "not 7 times, but 77 times."
This tells me a few things...Peter had just as much of a hard time forgiving others that hurt him as I do and Jesus commands us to forgive over and over again, and often times for the same thing. We can't seem to let things go because we still hang on to the hurt that others inflict on us. When we don't forgive and move on, it builds up and eats us up inside. The result is bitterness, anger and resentment. All of which cause huge problems in marriage...it did in mine. Things I thought I forgave him for, would come up later and cause arguments and I was constantly resentful and angry. Half the time, he didn't even realize it was even an issue. Like the saying goes...it's like taking poison and expecting the other to die. We allow the unforgiveness to take over our emotions and trickle into other areas of our life. It affects everything. How we are with our kids, to our spouse and our friendships. It makes us into people we aren't proud to be and certainly isn't being Christ-like.
In this chapter, it made a really impactful point, "When you forgive another person, you're not turning them loose. You're just turning them over to God, who can be counted on to deal with them in His way. It's not about winning or losing anymore. It's about freedom. It's about letting go. But great marriages are not created by people who never hurt each other, only by people who choose to keep "no record of wrongs". (1corinthians 13:5)"
Forgiving others isn't easy, but neither is forgiving ourselves. That can be an even harder challenge. We hold on to our own sins of the past and carry them into our future. Our mistakes/sins change us. They bring us down roads we couldn't imagine going down because we can't seem to release it and let it go. We are held captive by the guilt and shame of sins of our past.
We become addicts. Finding comfort and forgetting about our past by masking it and putting a temporary band-aid on it. Drinking, doing drugs, eating disorders, addictions of any kind. They become the vices we turn to to "deal" with the unforgiveness we don't give ourselves.
In 1 Timothy 1:15-16, it's says, "Christ Jesus came into this world to save sinners, of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in Him and receive eternal life."
There is nothing we can do to lose God's love for us. Jesus came to save sinners like you and me. Let God heal your heart and forgive others and yourself. We are all imperfect and will never live up to God's standards & noone will live up to ours. We will constantly be let down by others and our expectations will not always be met. Once we remind ourselves of that on a daily basis, things won't negatively impact us so much and we will be able to let go and let God.
http://www.klove.com/blog/post/2010/01/30/Love-Dare-Day-25.aspx
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