Today's Dare
Love is a choice, not a feeling. It is an initiated action, not a knee-jerk reaction. Choose today to be committed to love even if your spouse has lost most of their interest in recieving it. Say to them today in words similar to there, "I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don't love me in return."Today was one of the most amazing days I have had in sooo long! It was filled with God's love in everything I experienced and had the pleasure to be a part of. It all started in the early morning. I woke up and was so excited because I had my women's growth group breakfast at 9am at church. An older woman in my group had been on my heart for a couple weeks. Her husband was out of work and she had a lot of medical problems. She had voiced one time in our group that they were hurting tremendously financially, so I felt the need to help. I ended up going grocery shopping at 8am for her and her husband and got them some things I thought they might like and left them for her anonymously.
When my husband and I first separated, I had help my from my Christian sisters in every way and I felt it was time I pay it forward. God calls us to take care of one another in times of need. Even when we only have a little to give. We all need to know that our fears and worries are being heard and that others care. In the note I left her, I shared one of the bible stories of Moses. He needed help and encouragement from friends to do Gods work. It's such a beautiful story of friendship and sacrifice. (Exodus 17: 10-13)
I had a little time before group started, so I went into the sanctuary and prayed. I knelt down on my knees in from of the withered, beat up cross and prayed...hard. I shed a few tears because I felt Gods presence with me and could see the work he was doing through me and for me. It's incredibly overwhelming at times. I thanked Him for the trials I'm in and prayed to continue to keep my heart open to His will for my life. I then went into group and their was about 25 women in there and we all had the chance to openly share how the series on love we had been learning about, had impacted our lives so far. I raised my hand and without even thinking about what I was saying (and I honestly don't remember everything I said, it was all the Holy Spirit speaking through me!) I shared a cliff notes version of my journey and about my marriage. I talked about complete surrender to the Lords will for our lives and learning how to love sacrificially without expecting anything in return and how God is changing my heart and my husbands heart. I said how grateful I was that I had all of them around me during the most difficult time of my life to encourage me and keep me accountable. I felt so blessed to be able to share my testimony and to remind them to not give up.
A few women came up to me after and just thanked me for being so brave to share and told me that my story was very inspiring! As you can imagine, my heart was so full by the time I left!
I didn't share my story to get praise, I shared my story (as I do on here) to be transparent as an imperfect person and an example of Gods work in our lives when we are at our best and worst and hopefully my story can move even one person closer to God. That hope makes it all worth it.
To my surprise, my day was about about to get even better! I headed to my husbands house after and hung out for awhile and asked him if he wanted to go to Starbucks with me just to chat, he said yes. We both brought our Bibles, grabbed our coffees, sat across from each other at a high bar table and just talked non-stop for almost 2 hours! We talked about a lot of different things...us, things that we have both been going through, things that God has been teaching us and just talking and LISTENING to one another. We laughed and gave each other crap about things and just enjoyed being with one another. Right when we were leaving he told me how nice that was and I told him, "yeah, this WAS really nice!". It was so needed for both of us! I ended up going back to his house and having dinner with my 2 boys and some friends that are currently visiting him for the week. It was such a great night and I went home so full of love and completely exhausted and overwhelmed emotionally from everything that happened that day.
Today's dare is about learning how to love faithfully. We never dreamed when we were at the altar that our spouse could become the person we hate the most at times. Real life happens and the fairy tale becomes an unmet expectation and a broken dream. We become bitter and hateful and full of pride. We fight, we betray one another and hurt each other intentionally because we are hurting.
(Hurt people hurt people)
Loving our spouse is a CHOICE we have to make everyday. To love our spouses unconditionally, even when they don't want to receive our love and especially when we don't feel like giving it.
You have to give undeserved love to your spouse because God gave undeserved love to you. This has been an especially hard lesson for me.
It's only through surrendering to Gods will (letting go of control) and allowing Him to heal our hearts, are we then able to forgive and learn to really love.
http://www.klove.com/blog/post/2010/01/27/Love-Dare-Day-22.aspx
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