Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Letting Go

   A couple of months ago I had an amazing opportunity to go to Sugar Pine Christian Camp for a  Women's Retreat with our church. There was about 60 women from our congregation that got together with a few other churches in California and shared a weekend together and the theme was "Letting Go". As a woman, wife and mom that theme couldn't have been more perfect. We are well known to hold onto things and have problems letting go. My husband has gone on 2 of these retreats and always had such a great time, so I was really happy I finally got to experience what he experienced. It was an amazing weekend filled with lots of love, laughter and I shed quite a few tears. It made me realize how much I really do hold onto and taught me how to trust in Him and the amazing women that I see every Sunday, but never had the opportunity to really get to know on a personal level.
   I was also able to take a parenting seminar while I was there & that was really profound in itself. I learned so much in that hour, I was trying to write everything down so fast, but good news is that I have the recording here for you to listen to! I personally have done some of these things with my kids and guess what...they worked! Kids want structure and discipline and when we can give it to them in a loving way, things just work out so much better! Now, don't get the wrong idea here, I am far from a perfect parent. I have major struggles with many things. Patience and consistency being 2 of the big ones. We can get all the advice from well-meaning parents and friends, but in the end we learn mostly from our own mistakes and hopefully try to do better next time. In the mean time, not beating ourselves up about not being the perfect parent like Suzy Homemaker down the street with her perfect home, perfect kids, perfect marriage and just perfect everything! Because guess what, she struggles with the same things, she just keeps it hidden better. We all have "stuff", we all are flawed, we all are imperfect and we all have lots of baggage that we carry through our whole life. For me, some days, it feels like I'm carrying 3 large suitcases and 2 carry-ons, stumbling and tripping over myself with all my own crap. I find I have been asking myself alot lately WHY I can't let things go. Forgive and forget, right? Not so much. Not only forgive others, but forgive myself for what I've done to others as well. I don't know about you, but my past hurts onto others still haunt me. It's obviously not bothering them, so why can't I just let it go?
  Learning how to let it go and trust in the Lord is so difficult sometimes! I do know one thing is for sure...His plan for us is sooo much bigger than anything we could ever imagine for ourselves! My favorite bible verse reminds me of this "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer.29:11)
You see, your everyday struggles are for a reason. We have an amazing loving God! Nothing can separate us from His love for us, nothing!! (Romans 9:37-38)
  I write these things only to remind you that you're not alone, I'm not alone. There is always someone else fighting the same battles we are fighting, but learning to handle them all with grace and God's mercy is the only way to come out of the fight alive. Yes, we will have battle scars and wounds that sometimes will take forever to heal, but they will heal. Over time. Every time you feel the need to yell, say something sarcastic and hurtful or "lose your cool" with your kids, take a step back and ask  God to help you right then and there. I know it's hard to do in the midst of all the anger, resentment and frustration, trust me... I know! But just do it! Sometimes we don't know what to pray or ask God for, especially in the middle of those times when the enemy has a stronghold on us. Just simply ask for help.
He knows what you need.

Play these while your cleaning the house, driving or whenever. I promise they will give you more strength, encourage and help you to "Let Go".

Parenting Seminar: http://chirb.it/2PwKDI
"Letting Go" Recordings: http://www.chirbit.com/SPCC



My bunkmates!


Me & Rachel Barrentine- Our worship leader for the weekend. She is absolutely amazing! http://www.rachelbarrentine.com/

Me and my friend Deanna who made the decision to give her life to Christ that weekend!



Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Dad mimics daughter's tantrum- video

This is the funniest video I have seen in along time and I had to share because all of us with kids have been there. This Dad is hilarious! Bwahahahaha!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/19/dad-mimics-daughters-tantrum_n_4129284.html?utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false

Surrender & Trust

 This semester at church, I recently joined a growth group called "Stuck". It is about the places we get stuck in our lives and how God can set us free. It has brought up a lot of painful memories & hurts of my past & present, but all things that I need to give to God and allow proper healing. Through this study, I have also learned a lot about how much I still hold on to and can't seem to let go of. It is like it's a part of my identity and without it, I don't know who I am. It has all molded me into who I am today and the type of Mom and Wife I am. This is a good and bad.
 I sometimes realize I have become the exact thing I was running away from & never wanted to become and some days I am so proud of who I am & what I have gone through and actually came out a somewhat sane and normal person and I'm not locked up in a padded cell somewhere because I've lost my mind and gone cookoo!
 The thing is, we hold onto so much anxiety, pain, fear and stress because if we let go we feel like we have lost all control when in reality we have no control at all. We live in a society where "perfection" is expected and all our flaws are analyzed and pointed out and people remember the negative about you waaay more than the positive. We have daily fear & anxiety of losing our jobs, not pleasing everyone, keeping our kids safe. Stress from our marriage, relationships, families, and keeping the perfect "front" so people don't know how broken you are.  I don't know about you, but all that is enough to make anyone have a mental break-down. How do we cope on a daily basis when we are all so fragile and so close to going over the edge?

God asks us to surrender & trust.

All He wants us to do is open up our hearts and minds to Him. Allow Him to repair it little by little. All our stories are different, but we are all connected. He made each and every one of us for a purpose. A purpose that has already been in the works since the day we were born. Everything we have gone through up till today has been for a specific reason- and only He knows why.
God is asking us, "Do you trust me?"
Some days, I can answer a very definite and profound YES! Other days, not so much. My stubbornness and pride takes over and I have to be the one in control. Then, when things don't go my way, I cowardly turn inside myself and realize, I was never in control in the first place. I will learn this lesson over and over again in life. This will always be a struggle for me. I have to constantly remind myself that by surrendering everything, we find freedom.

Monday, October 21, 2013

1st Entry!

Writing this 1st blog entry, I can't help but feel a little like Doogie Howser at the end of the episode, hoping that I have something profound to say. Lol! I'm hoping that this outlet will allow me to connect with you, as you get a peak inside of my life and my thoughts. Things I struggle with, my fears, what makes me happy, excited and following me through our lives as a family. Its an adventure and I hope we can all help each other enjoy the ride through laughter, noticing the small blessings and taking it one day at a time!
My back story: My husband Nate and I have been married for 3 1/2yrs. We are both born and raised in Northern Minnesota where we met in Jr.High and both separately moved to different parts of California, where we later met back up in life. We have a 3yr.old son (Parker) and I have been blessed with an amazing step-daughter (Hannah) who is 6yrs.old. We do our best to raise our children in a Godly filled home & keep our Christian faith on the forefront of our core values.
We are adventurers and love the outdoors, camping, off-roading and whatever other mischieve
we find ourselves in! Since this 1st entry is close to Halloween, here's how we celebrated this year for the holiday and a few other family photos! Enjoy! :)





Halloween 2013
3yr.anniversary- Half Moon Bay, Ca.
 

Valentines Day Dinner 2013
Our beautiful Hannah! Age 6
Summer 2013

Mother's Day with Parker 2012


Spring 2011




Spring- 2011


Wedding Day- Lake Tahoe May 2010

Wedding Day- Lake Tahoe May 2010
Our 1st date to Alcatraz!